Hey, Man! I Gotta Go!

Last week I did some serious air travel. 

 

That meant doing everything in my power not to talk to my seatmate.  I’m not anti-social, I just have no desire to be on the receiving end of someone else’s angst about flying or hearing about how their once exciting marriage has tumbled into the abyss of the mundane and would I like to get together for coffee when we land in Chicago? 

 

Thankfully, my travel fortress of  laptop, iPod and numerous publications, made it clear that I was not the chatty sort which freed me up to read and write at my leisure. 

 

Ironically, I found an article in Time about the amount of junk mail that’s sent out each year.  It was staggering.  It also gave me a flashback of the mailbox rage I had a couple of weeks ago.  Turns out it may not be the advent of menopause after all since mailbox rage seems to be a growing trend.  It’s even spawned web-site dedicated to eliminating it.  I plan to check them out as soon as I get back on terra firma – after I chuck that estrogen cream I’ve been smearing all over myself.

 

But back to the plane:  I saw something very strange that I’ve never seen before.

 

The flight attendants have resorted to putting up a strange metal “gate” between the cabin and the galley in what looked like an attempt to keep anyone from using the toilet. .  It looked a bit like something that would keep livestock contained or keep babies away from stairs.  It didn’t give me a warm fuzzy feeling since I had drunk about 5 cups of coffee.   

 

I remember there used to be signs in the airline toilets that asked each passenger “as a courtesy to others, please wipe the sink after use”.  I always thought that was a clever way for the airlines to cut cleaning expenses by getting paying passengers to do it but it appears they’ve taken this one step further.  I don’t think they want us in there at all. 

 

I’m a naturally curious person so I asked the flight attendant if the fence was electrified.

 

They didn’t think it was funny.

 

Damn! They better take that baby gate down soon; the coffee is kickin’ in.