A Car Possessed
A crazy thing happened to me on the way to a city that will remain nameless.
I was driving my husband’s new car (his idea, not mine). It’s one of those cars built for speed which is really a shame since we live in a town with a speed limit of 25. As I got onto Highway 1 for my much anticipated 2 ½ hours of solitude and satellite radio (where I often channel Susan Tedeschi… badly ) I noticed that the hood of the car, which, to me is technically not a hood since the engine is in the back (??) popped open. Hmmm. This can’t be good. I had visions of the damn thing flying all the way open as I barelled down the freeway at the manufacturer recommended speed of sound, blocking my view, causing me to piss my pants, careening down a cliff and did I have on clean underwear and….well, you get the picture. Like a good driver who always holds the steering wheel at the practical 10 and 2 position, I safely pulled over and shut it. To make a long story short, this happened 5 times before I got 2 miles. Since I didn’t have an industrial can of lighter fluid and a torch with which to set the little fucker on fire for spoiling my plans, I decided to do the next best thing and take it to the dealer. The prognosis was grim: a hood exorcism must be performed. The car must not be driven lest I put my very soul at risk. Okey, dokey. Here’s the key, padre.
But the Car Exorcist gave me a really great driving tip that I’ll share with you now. In the event that the car hood should actually pop open completely while barelling down the freeway at a million miles an hour, the manufacturer made sure there was enough room between the open hood and the actual car body so the driver could see enough of the road to safely pull over.
How ‘bout those car manufacturers! They think of everything!